Sunday, July 31, 2011
PROLOGUE
It was a perfect morning, sky partially filled with clouds and sun was playing hide and seek with clouds. And suddenly it started raining, the rain showers was not that hard, sound of rain drops sounded so nice. Meanwhile in a small room with only one window and a bed near it, on which lied a boy. He was having a sound sleep, when something broke the silence of the room. It was his mobile playing a song... Tune mere jana kabhi nahi jana…. I it was his alarm which rang for some time making the boy wake up. He was feeling sick as if something was ramming his head. He felt terrible. He tried to recall what happened last night, and faintly he recalled he got drunk like anything. And some images started to flash in front of his eyes. He never wanted to remember those moments. He took out a cigarette, lighted it and began smoking. The room was filled with smoke. And den his phone rang again. It was a call he never wished to come, never wanted to pick, he always wished the person calling never existed. He ignored the call, but the phone rang again. He threw the phone on bed and went for shower. Nothing can make you feel better other than a shower.
He was feeling refreshed. He checked his phone, it had 22 missed called and 1SMS which stated, “are you trying to ignore me or you really don’t want to talk to me. But can we meet for one last time”. He replied, “okie fine where do you want to meet? I just can come for an hour. Have some important work”. And soon the reply came back, “fine, can you come to Pizza Hut in Big Bazaar…. I will be there by 12.30 at noon… see ya den”. Soon to which he answered, “okie fine, I’ll be there”.
He knew it’s going to be a long day, as he stepped out of his house, he saw it was a beautiful day, the passing by clouds made it shady and sunny every now and then. He started to walk down the road, as he stayed at a place where transportation was not that good, so he had to walk for few minutes. As he walked down, it started raining again,, but instead of rushing, he walked slower for the reason he always loved rain a lot, and had got drenched in rain whenever he got a chance, so how could he miss such a chance when he was going to meet someone he avoided the most. He was enjoying every drop falling on his face. He was enjoying everything, the sound, the aroma, the nostalgia. Suddenly he recalled he had to meet that person, so he moved towards the road to get an auto. Soon he got one and in half an hour he reached the place. It was still raining; he preferred waiting out in rain and getting drenched and he sat on the bench outside and was waiting for the one he hated the most.
And gradually the rain stopped, he was completely wet and as he checked his phone, he found a SMS stating, “sorrie I’ll be lil late as it started raining cats and dogs…, hope you don’t mind. Please wait for me if you reach earlier”.  To which he replied, “Okie fine but do come soon, I got few important works undone”.  And he started recalled something and muttered she is never gonna change, he knew her for quite long time though he was not in touch with her for last 2 years…  she always had a habit of getting late… well it’s not only she, most girls have that habit, only a few exceptional are out of list.  But this time she wasn’t that late, she reached within next 15 minutes. He marked she had a new pleasure, black colour. She parked her pleasure and approached him. There was silence engulfing them and she looked into his eyes and he started getting lost somewhere. Somewhere he never wished to go back again.

posted by Sachin Shresta @ 7/31/2011 12:31:00 AM   3 comments
Saturday, July 30, 2011
new beginning
Wow I just completed my prologue of my novel. It feels so good to initiate something, I feel like posting my prologue here but I want to keep it all with me till I publish it someday…. I’m trying to create characters and seeking help from friends... I really dun want to make a friction… I want to make something that was real… mix up stories of few peoples connect them and bring them out to world… hope I succeed in my way…. It’s a new beginning…
posted by Sachin Shresta @ 7/30/2011 03:27:00 PM   0 comments
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
It's Hard For Me To Pretend That I Don't Care About You Anymore
I know this will not remain forever
However it’s beautiful
Your eyes, hands, and your warm smile
They’re my treasure
It’s hard to forget
I wish there was a solution
Don’t spend your time in confusion
I’ll turn back now and spread

My broken wings
Still strong enough to cross the ocean with
My broken wings
How far should I go drifting in the wind?
Higher and higher in the light
My broken wings
Still strong enough to cross the ocean with
My broken wings
How far should I go drifting in the wind?
Across the sky just keep on flying

Falling in the sky
That isn’t rain 
Did I ever chain you down to my heart
Cause I was afraid of you?
No, I couldn’t hold any longer
Love is not a toy
Let go of me now
The time we spent is perpetual
Our future is not real
So I’ll leap into the air

posted by Sachin Shresta @ 7/27/2011 01:25:00 PM   0 comments
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Love never subsides into friendship ?

Friendship may, and often and often dose, grow into love, but love never subsides into friendship, says George Gordon Byron.

 Do you identify with Lord Byron’s words? Personally, I think so. Hatred is usually raised from passionate love. Strong love leads to too much care. Too much care would ruin the love. In many cases, it was whom you love most hate you most. You want to be friends with her/him. It is only a fantasy! Love never subsides into friendship!

 Love and friendship are very different. Love involves in strong passion and the sense of possession. Love needs to be unique. You can fall in love with only one lover at a period (if you are a serious person), but you can maintain good friendships with tens of friends. I agree with the above opinion that friendship can mature into deep love but love nearly fades into friendship.

 sorry its too long, please read this ….I broke up with my best friend a year ago….she was deeply and madly in love with me whereas I soon realised that I was hurting her a lot and gave nothing other then pain, I broke it off without any warning and she was devastated…she became really panicky about losing me and offered her friendship instead…she thought maybe this will do the trick and she can keep me close to her in whatever relation she can manage to…but I really am not comfortable about this friendship thing after the break up …moreover I felt the same old leftover feelings which were not doing anything good in this relationship, the difference being only the labels of gf-bf changed! I broke it off completely and calmly sorted out everything with her consent that we will give it some time before getting into friendship...she agreed! I don’t deny the fact that I care for her a lot and cant see her struggling with it...I have always felt my urge to talk with her and called her whenever she missed me or I missed her ….recently we didn’t talk for a month at a stretch... we do scrap each other…. But I feel that she still wants me in her life and is very obsessed with me! Although she claims that I am only her best friend but she still NEGOTIATES and desperately wants me to come along with her ….. She knows I care for her!
I don’t deny that I have been a major culprit in whatever is happening to her…. I just want to go away from her…. So far that I won’t become any prob for her…….. I love her but I want to go far…. I’m frustrated, devastated, confused with job, love, life, family and friendship…. I feel really bad and lonely as to have changed and feel like I won’t forgive myself for being so unfair to such a lovely caring girl I have ever met in my life! Sorry but I can’t cope up with this void in my life!
I am in a fix ….I really don’t think we are heading anywhere! Instead she is trying to get closer to me every time she scraps and I feel pity for her and emotionally tortured at the same time! I care for this girl a lot people! She is not anyone so that I should forget about her and move on consoling myself that its for good, I tried to ignore her, but it gets painful after sometime and I end up replying her scraps yet another miseries... maybe I have given her the hopes….she has been with me every time and has liked me like hell and has supported me with her true heart! I can’t be so mean to her! But the situation demands something else which is really tough for both of us! Can this friendship really work in this case? She realises that I am trying to avoid her and talk less as much as I can… But she can’t help herself come behind me or show that SOFT CORNER AND DEEP CARE AND CONCERN she has for me.... she is OK... but I can feel the pain in her voice on phone... this really turns me off and I feel guiltier! Please give you opinion ….I don’t want to lose her but her wanting me behavior is driving me away from her!

Why can’t love turn back into friendship……… the more in ignore…… getting on with other gals… nothing is possible… I’m so pissed off……..
  
posted by Sachin Shresta @ 7/24/2011 12:07:00 PM   0 comments
Saturday, July 23, 2011
Boy/ Men also have emotions
I think everyone might have read abt Mom's, Wife's and Girl's...  Its time to learn something abt Boy/ Men...

Who is a boy / man ?

A boy/ man  is one of the most beautiful creations of God.  He starts compromising at very tender age. He sacrifices his chocolates for his sister.  Later he sacrifices his love for just a smile on his parents face. He sacrifices his love for his wife and children by working late nights. He builds their future by taking loans from banks and then repaying them for the life time. Thus he sacrifices full youth for his wife and children without any complain. Believe me he struggles a lot but still has to hear the music (scolding) of Mother, wife and his boss. Yet every mother, wife and boss tries to have control over him.  Finally his life ends up by compromising for others happiness. He is that creature of God who no one can compete with. Respect every boy/man in your life. You will never know what he has sacrificed for you. Just extend your hand when he needs it and you shall receive twice fold love from him.

Enough Of Girls /women / Wife Emotions Now… we Boys also Have Emotions and respect it.
posted by Sachin Shresta @ 7/23/2011 01:50:00 PM   0 comments
Friday, July 22, 2011
sad n unworthy
Really, today I felt oddly sad and unworthy. I had not felt that way in a while. I felt unlovable, ugly and unwanted. The shadow has emerged from a nap. Why? I don't know. I have not had good luck getting into any commitment. I am definitely making new friends but yet I feel removed. I was sitting in the usual location and just felt incredibly lonely. All I wanted to do was run home to truly be alone. I’m asking someone out, but its been always a ‘no’. I have never been asked out in person. I don't know what it is about me but there must be something. Just like there was something keeping me from making friends in general. That I am not good enough. I don't think I am ugly. Maybe in the back of my mind I think it is my past. I don't know. I am a good, responsible, friendly and some what reserved guy. Maybe too reserved. I must put out some sort of vibe. I don't know. I don't seem to have an unfriendly vibe to peoples around me. I don't know. The shadow has overtaken me this afternoon. I want it lost again. It seems to stalk me and waits for the minute to pounce. I wish I had answers. Still i'm happy... life moves on.........
posted by Sachin Shresta @ 7/22/2011 01:54:00 PM   1 comments
why this happened
I found peace,
Whenever I came near you
I found my existence,
Which I had forgotten

I remembered you in the
Season of grief
Whenever I was sad because of loneliness,
I remembered you

Beware heart!
You are falling in love once again
Heart,stop right there
You are falling in love once again

I don't know why this happened
posted by Sachin Shresta @ 7/22/2011 01:48:00 PM   0 comments
confused
It is just me and loneliness here. Some days I love it, today I hate it.

Loneliness permeates me today. I don’t know why.

Sometimes I think it would just be better if I had a someone. Then I think of the time I had a gal friend and I am happy to live alone.

I think I am ugly and nothing I do will change that.

When I am alone, my mind plays games with me. Why can’t my mind be like everyone else’s?

Will I ever be “cured”?
posted by Sachin Shresta @ 7/22/2011 01:44:00 PM   0 comments
truth
Truth… what is truth ….. Truth has a variety of meanings, such as the state of being in accord with a particular fact or reality, or being in accord with the body of real things, real events or actualities…. Truth can be different based on the perception of different persons for the same thing… cause what I know can be truth for me… but it can’t be same for other…. And vice versa……  hope someday I come across the real truth which would be same for everyone……
posted by Sachin Shresta @ 7/22/2011 01:15:00 PM   0 comments
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
completely new beginning
Dunno why but I feel I should keep on writing… and now I’m going to start from where I had started earlier…..  from the beginning and wid the same note….

You I ain’t a rich kid, just a poor nerd,
Ain’t got no money, my pockets full of mud.
Faded jeans and ragged shirts, thank god they are in,
Cuz those are the only things I have to fit in.
So if you are that kinda gal, who just goes for money.
You can check out Harry, he's got a big limousine.
      
All I have got is unconditional love.
All I can promise you is I’ll be there when the things are tough.

No I can’t promise you dinner in golden plates.
No I can’t promise you disco nights so late.
We can get a candle or two and light up my place.
Maybe wash some crockery, order pizzas at low rate.
No lousy music, my guitar gently plays
A song, written, especially for you babe.
All I have got is unconditional love.
All I can promise you is I’ll be there when the sea is rough.
posted by Sachin Shresta @ 7/20/2011 01:56:00 PM   0 comments
emptiness female version
Suddenly came across the female version of the Rohan Rathores EMPTINESS … sung by Kushi Diwakar…. And I am just loving it…………

Tu aaja tu aaja
Mujhko meri  saja to suna ja
Wo aahe haa wo asu
Mere hisse ke mujko rula ja

Shapne tere sare
, jinme mein rehti thi
Tukre banke meri, jakm sine mein kar gayi ho

Meine mere jaana kyun nehi jaana

Ishq tera dard tera aaa..
Meine mere jaana kyun nehi jaana
Ishq tera dard tera ho...

Akeli akeli

Reh gayi bin tere akeli
Mein tarpu ya mein tarsu
Ya chale ayu mein pass tere

Itni tanhai hay
, jindegi kho gayi
Bate karne sare, aa rahi hu tujh se hi ho

Meine mere jaana aab hay jaana

Ishq tera dard tera hay...
Meine mere jaana aab hay jaana
Ishq tera dard tera

Tu jo geya...
Hole mera rahta hay
Dil ye mera...
Khud sehi tanha rahta hay

And I feel too lonely yea

Where's a better place on this emptiness
And I am too lonely yea
Where's a better place on this emptiness yeah!
posted by Sachin Shresta @ 7/20/2011 01:49:00 PM   0 comments
Me n My Loneliness
Loneliness is the feeling of being alone, be it physical, emotional, or spiritual. It is a strong feeling, strong enough that it can even drive people into psychotic episodes and suicidal fits of rage. The pain that it can bring drives down right into our souls and throwing us into total darkness.
I would like to quote what Orson Welles once said. He said that we are born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we're not alone. The moment that we create illusions for ourselves is called life. Perhaps that is why we feel lonely even in that particular moment that we are supposed to create illusions for ourselves to escape loneliness. Enough of facts, let's go on to personal experience.

In this wonderful journey called life, we are filled with many emotions which are inevitable, and among these emotions, the emotion that stings me the most is loneliness. Nobody can journey their life alone, utterly. When I was a teen, i disconnected myself from the world outside and made my world on internet, and today when i see my other class mates, i realise what i have lost and what they gained. i missed the part, where they made loads of friends, i too made many friends but they were only on internet, their existance was there till was online or i had cell phone, till we chatted, texted or talked over calls. after the calls ended, texted stopped or chats ended, i was left alone. and then the pain that stings your mind, your heart, your soul, your spirit known as loneliness. For me to watch a person suffering from loneliness is like watching a patient dying from cancer. After all, some cancer patients are lonely too. For I can feel the stinging pain of loneliness, I always had a soft spot for loners.

Among all the feelings I've experienced either putting myself into others' shoes or based on my personal experience, loneliness is the worst feeling I could ever imagine. It is worse than any physical harm can do to me and mind you, It is worse than any emotional conflicts I have ever encountered for I have been humiliated, embarrassed, yelled at, ignored, told I was no good, being insulted, given hurtful nicknames and the list goes as long as a receipt you would receive when you empty the goods in a shopping mall. Life on this planet is never easy and that is why we can move on only with the help of others, of those who care. Going through life alone, walking down the paths of darkness in a one-man journey, is not totally impossible, but your mind, your soul, your heart will definitely and repeatedly tell you to leave this world and find friends in another world instead.

From my point of view, a loner is just a nice person lost in the crowd. A shy, quiet person who has not found himself, lack of confidence or was not given any chance to join the crowd, in short, ignored. I strongly advise each and every citizen of planet Earth to reach out for these lonely people who can be nice and talented in several ways yet to be discovered instead of cornering ourselves with our own assembly gossiping about how weird, odd, eccentric, inscrutable and dreadful that loner is, which can be hurtful and demotivating. No matter how busy you are, you can still make time for yourself. So, why not for others who need them? Donating a few minutes of your bathing time or time for meals would not mean that you cannot bathe, eat, breathe or continue what you wanted to do. It only means less of it, and a little for others. If you can not make time for others, one day, nobody is gonna make time for you, and thereafter, you will be thrown in the valleys of darkness, accompanied by the excruciating, crucifying pain called loneliness.

And this blog is a part of me where i learnt to befriend my loneliness..... its all ME N MY LONELINESS and how i started writing here..

posted by Sachin Shresta @ 7/20/2011 12:00:00 AM   1 comments
Thursday, July 14, 2011
Its me
It’s so strange. And yes, I know it's not the first time this has been discussed. And this one, when it really comes down to it, will be no different from the others. But it’s another one of those times when this little part of my life that I have controlled so it won’t consume me, starts bubbling up again. I don’t know why, little things start it, get me thinking again. Why, am I, an almost 21year old boy, incapable of long term commitment? It’s quite embarrassing to think or talk about... Almost laughable at how pathetic that seems. If my story were told to a random stranger I’m sure they would think the reason would be that I am some dirty-faced, antisocial, impressionable, loner. I'll have you know, I am none of those things. I have friends, great friends; the majority of which are in healthy normal relationships. I however, am not.

I'm not saying I am not loved, because I really am - but not that way. Not in the way that is different from anything else and can make you feel the way that nothing else can. I wonder what it’s like to know you are loved that way. It fascinates me because it is completely foreign to me. It’s like imagining what it would feel like to be weightless in a rocketship on its way to the moon. Unfathomable until you actually experience it. And, for one reason or another, it seems as though I am not cut out to be an astronaut.

People want me, but not enough. Not enough to take it past the initial thrill of it. And I know how it works; oh I’ve seen it hundreds of times. Heard it, watched it... Just not in the first person that's all. It’s always looking behind glass windows, doors, at the others who have found it. And even though sometimes its fleeting, short-lived, its still real. I wonder about the day when I will be the one people are watching.

I have all of these things I want to do before I die; ride in a hot air balloon, awarded with oscar, learn to play guitar, see the statue of liberty, silly things like that. But more than any of those things, I would like to experience the feeling of being completely and utterly loved. In a way that not your parents, your best friend nor your sister loves you. But the love you get from someone that you feel the same about. Maybe that’s the silliest of all, but to me it is the most important.

I don’t know. I really truly don’t know, as I’ve said a thousand times before and will probably continue saying until I get my answer - if I get an answer. Sometimes it seems as though I’m reaching in the dark, for something I know must be there but it’s just so hard to find.

I still hold on to a tiny thread of hope that one day it’ll hit me over the head and I’ll just stand there baffled and realize I’ve finally found what I’ve been looking for, for as long as I can remember. But I also keep my head just below the clouds because the only thing worse for me than never finding what you’ve been looking for would be to constantly wait for it when it never comes.

Anyway, to all the people who have found it, my hat is off to you. I hope you know how lucky you are to be experiencing one of the most amazing things in the world, I’m sure you do. And as for me, I will continue on with my life, doing the things I love, that feel right, and hope for the best. they say the best way to find love is by doing what you love, and I suppose I’m trying my best to do that right now. So maybe... Maybe, one day everything will fall into place. And if not, I’ll at least have the things I truly love to keep me occupied.
posted by Sachin Shresta @ 7/14/2011 01:48:00 PM   3 comments
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
what i'd be for u
For you I’d just be there. Someone to talk to, share things with, confide in…someone to ask you how your day was and you’d be comfortable enough to share, without fear of ridicule or disinterest. Someone to cuddle with and share intimate moments with, someone you will always feel safe with. We can play together, laugh together, and cry together. Know when you want to be alone and when you want someone to hold you close. Understand your limits and know where to draw the line. Know your friends and accept them all as my friends. I would trust you and be trustworthy enough for you. You will have no fears with me, live dangerously and make everyday an adventure. Live life and love it, have no regrets. Be alone and never be lonely. Passion kindness, honesty, happiness, sincerity and respect will be everyday words. Hatred, sadness, contempt and hypocrisy will never come about. A million people in the world and I only have eyes for you. Wear your emotions on your sleeves and I will care for them as my own. Give me a smile and I will give you my whole. Be there for me and I’ll be there for you a thousand times over.
posted by Sachin Shresta @ 7/13/2011 01:44:00 PM   0 comments
Sunday, July 10, 2011
everythings going to be alright
Suddenly I’m learning about positive sides of life, how to adjust with life, how to be happy with what you get, and suddenly I realize what my quotes, Everythings gonna be alright meant… now things are getting alright…. And getting everything….. I’m so happy, getting back all happiness, love, life, dream on…..
posted by Sachin Shresta @ 7/10/2011 03:22:00 PM   1 comments
Saturday, July 9, 2011
hopes, wishes and me
Every time there’s a gleam of hope….. Somehow something or someone pulls it away from me... Every time I see the light every time I come nearer to my life someone something stops me... Diverts it to another path... Another hurdle another close door... It is disheartening... Breaks my heart even more and more... Throws me deeper in my sorrow n despair... In my abyss... The journey to my life to my heart becomes cold... I don’t know why... But I guess I do... Its not that I don’t do anything... Its not that I don’t give my all but the more I push the more it pulls me back... I cry at nite and I swear at heavens above... Is death the answer is it the only way to remove the grip of fate... For if it is then I will embrace it….. I will fulfill the momentum to which I believe I am being propelled to….. How can I escape this…? I believe I can’t now it is too late.... I will prepare…. I don’t want to ask why anymore for I’m not getting any answers…. I don’t want to seek advices for they are all the same…. In the end the choice is mind and as always I will not regret it I will stand my ground and I only ask God to have mercy on my soul….. It is perhaps the only way for my love to live again for her to be free happy and at peace.... For my love ones to be happy and be comfortable….. And so I need to prepare….. And be at peace….. Soon…….

You may ask why???  For I’m nearing the end of my rope.... Hope is fading and my soul is dying…. My heart pumps ever so slow ever so quiet…. You know if you are there…... You know the feeling….. You smell the despair.... You see the darkness….. The coldness the numbness envelopes you….. Perhaps you have been there….. I’ve never been there and I wish no one should be where I am now…. I don’t think you are a coward if you end the gift….. I don’t think it’s an easy way out because once you do it there is no way out…. I am God fearing….. I believe in the goodness of God and Man….. I believe in miracles and I believe in dreams….. I believe I am blessed….. And I believe I am cursed.... I have made several mistakes and have hurt the people I love most….. As the consequences of my choices I cannot amend….. I try so hard I give all my resources and all that I have to make things right and yet it falls short ever so short….. I so wish….. I so crave…... I kill and hurt to be with you my love….. I cry shout and kick myself ….. I do things to make it happen and yet it’s too slow or too short…. I know today what fate is saying I don’t have the patience to wait any longer…. I know fate wants me to wait for she isn’t ready….. I can’t anymore….. It so kills me……so destroys me...… so breaks me….. The manifestation even becomes physical that I know it will only eat me up inside…. I know my heart my life waited as well but my heart my life isn’t prepared isn’t ready…. I know coz I see what fate wanted me to see for quite a while now…. Its just I refuse to see….. Cause I wanted so bad to be with my heart my life…. This moment in my life the plateau of my life will turn on my on terms and my choice will not be liked by my love but it is only way for my love and love ones to be great and at peace….. And so it shall be done…..

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posted by Sachin Shresta @ 7/09/2011 02:50:00 AM   1 comments
Friday, July 8, 2011
WHY
i woke up and now i see things differently..i lost something so valuable..and i can't seem to bring it back..am i insensitive to feel this way..or am i selfish then to feel strongly bout what i'm feeling now… in a moment it flew away and i haven't seen it come back to me..will it come back..should it come back..experts say reason for  the lost was not intentional..but i said to them it was a conscious choice..therefore for me its not an excuse..there is no excuse..it was intentional..and therefore damaging beyond repair..every time i remember the moment..my heart beats so fast n i can't shake the awful feeling…disappointment.. me ..the thought of it haunts me..it strikes my gut up to now..cold death hits my spine..why do i feel this way..shouldn't i feel the compassion..shouldn't i understand..shouldn't i feel more protective..shouldn't i care more..i feel the burden as it is..it is my fault..its so heavy i cant even relax..cant even have peace at any given point..cant breathe when i remember it..my fuckin fault and i can't  feel….but i made a promise..gotta keep it..i know ..will my feelings destroy me or make me whole..will you bring me back to life make me live again..that is the question..there is no fear..there is only sadness..again i ask why…why..happiness..where are you..why have u forsaken me..God have mercy on me..i should just pull the trigger so all can live again and move on..

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posted by Sachin Shresta @ 7/08/2011 01:31:00 PM   1 comments
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
wish u come back
Was it wrong to fall in love with you? Was it wrong to dream of your smile each time you cross my mind? Was it wrong to wish you were mine when all that's left are memories of you? Was it wrong when all I did was try to make things right between us even though you did me wrong? Tats hard can't you see? Everything is wrong now, but my heart would be wrong if I lied and say I don't love you anymore.

I don't care what you do. Get attached. Be happy. Disappear, come back. Forgive me. You can put me through that countless times and I can still put up with it. You can always count on me. You can take it out on me. You can offload on me. You know why? Because I love you and I'm still your best friend and your soul mate.

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posted by Sachin Shresta @ 7/06/2011 01:38:00 PM   1 comments
Sunday, July 3, 2011
dreams


We all have some dream and expectation from life. Actually all dreams are not really ours these are given by our well wishers and learn to live with it. when we born our parents and family members see a lot of dream and they have a lot of expectation with us.And i think these dreams show us a way to make our life. Some people says that they have a lot of expectation and they cannot bear it. I think this is wrong.

When we grow with time these dreams supports us to stand and teach how to run on the road of life. Every one wants to fulfill their dreams and when he does he feels an strange feeling. But as far as my opinion is concern i think you can be happy when you fulfill your dream but whenever you fulfill those dream which you didn't see these were seen by your well wishers, you get a lot of happiness.


So, See dream and try to fulfill them, but give first priority to others dreams..... and make your life bless full.

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posted by Sachin Shresta @ 7/03/2011 12:14:00 PM   0 comments
Saturday, July 2, 2011
sad
I m so sad..!! so depressed...!!! but no one is their who could feel my feeling inside me which is killing me badly..........m so lonely......crying...... waiting for someone who will cum n wipe my tears aways!!!!!.....i dont understand ..this....!! y the hell i fell for them wen i know non of them will cum to catch me......y am i feel like this suddenly............!!!!...:'(.

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posted by Sachin Shresta @ 7/02/2011 02:21:00 PM   0 comments
Friday, July 1, 2011
bit harder life
 sometimes I just get sick of being lonely. I get sick of having to rely on myself and my imagination for any kind of deeper mental or emotional stimulation. It’s getting to a point now where, I’ve had way too much time to think. My heart is forming cobwebs because the people I met, the experiences I’ve had so far, just aren’t cutting it. I think my imagination has had far too much time to become so specific in designing what my heart wants, I’m scared reality is just never going to compare. How can it? I never really gave it a chance. I’m torn between wanting only the best for myself and impatience. How much longer is it really going to take?

I feel like it’s impossible because I’ve made it impossible. I want magic. I want to feel such an intense pull towards someone it’s like our worlds just crashed into each other, changing them and me and everything I thought I knew. I want fireworks, and butterflies and magnetism, something tumultuous and huge and exciting and new. I want something to pull me out of myself and my head and my over-analysis and make me feel again, because I’ve forgotten. And I don’t think I can get it back on my own. But I’m scared I’m waiting out for a super unrealistic ideal that I’ve created for myself. I’m scared I’m chasing nothing. And every day it’s getting harder and harder to have faith in myself and everything I believe in.
posted by Sachin Shresta @ 7/01/2011 01:46:00 PM   0 comments
 
 
About Me


Name: Sachin Shresta
Home: bhubaneswar, orissa, India
About Me: i m a common guy out of world who's lil weird and crazy, bzy always in his dream, imaginations, in his world of thought but no one know wat he is thinkng but there will be a day when all will praise him.. i am ADITYA, thats what my friends know me as, i now waorking as a LAYOUT DESIGER at a local Newspaper... i too do freelancing for MOTION GRAPHICS AND VFX shots, i'm too a GRAPHICS DESIGNER,...... well i am what i am and i love to enjoy life to fullest kya pata KAL HO NA HO. Trustin U iz my Decision ...n Provin me ri8 iz ur choice.......
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